如何在三十秒內惹毛你的櫃員XD - 銀行

By Mary
at 2011-08-09T22:49
at 2011-08-09T22:49
Table of Contents
本文是一篇不良示範型的徵文,僅供參考~
如果您想與您的櫃員和樂相處,建議不要效法文中的行為XD
很無奈的是,本文當中所有的範例,通通都是真實發生過的。(默)
 ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄
【如何在最短時間內惹毛你的櫃員】
1.沒禮貌地裝熟。
範例一:「小姐,妳是不是剛生產完?
我覺得我上次看到妳的時候妳比較瘦耶~」
範例二:「欸,你們銀行會不會很難考啊?
我想叫我老婆來考,因為她很笨,在外面無法生存。」
範例三:「你們這裡一個月薪水多少?
我女兒也在銀行啊,可是她是碩士哦,在民營的永x金控,
升很快餒!一個月可能比你們多個兩三萬哦,呵呵呵^^」
2.殺價殺到血流成河也無怨無悔。
範例一:「什麼?託收一張還沒到期的票要五元?
你們真的很愛賺錢欸,我去中x信託、x新、國x世x
人家都不收錢的!」
範例二:「小姐我要買美金五百塊,有沒有優惠?
沒有喔?我是你們的老客戶餒,匯率算便宜一點?
不行喔?我有帶存摺印章和身分證餒,有沒有優惠?
我認識你們那個張三小姐耶?啊調走啦?李四先生?啊退休啦?
我就住在你們分行隔壁餒?」
3.銀行就是你家(?)
範例一:在等待櫃員進行交易的時候,
自動從櫃員的筆筒裡抽剪刀出來剪指甲。
範例二:「我要去市場買菜,這個東西先借我寄在妳這裡一下,
我等一下回來拿。」
範例三:晚上十點半。客服中心打電話給分行緊急聯絡人,
「客人說他車子停在你們分行的公務停車場,
現在他要用車,但是你們鐵門已經拉下來了。
請你們分行派一個人去幫他開鐵門。」
4.一個台灣兩種時區
範例一:15:40 按門鈴走小門進來,施施然走到服務台前面
「我要開戶。」
範例二:15:50 走到外匯櫃台前面一屁股坐下
「歐現在還可以買美金嗎?可以吧?幫我算算一萬塊可以買多少。」
範例三:15:30 坐在外匯櫃台前面表示要匯款到紐西蘭,
花了半小時的時間,把包包裡的所有紙屑掏得滿櫃台都是,
找不到寫著收款人資訊的那張小紙頭。
15:59 找到了,不肯接受外匯即將收盤,大嚷:
「姑娘妳立刻來幫我匯!明明還有很多時間!」
(儘管不希望有什麼可以待續的但我想這是一定會有後續的吧*嘆*)
--
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